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Bruce, Lenny

  • The liberals can understand everything but people who don't understand them.

  • Satire is tragedy plus time. You give it enough time, the public, the reviewers will allow you to satirize it. Which is rather ridiculous, when you think about it.

  • The only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can't fake it . . . try to fake three laughs in an hour--ha ha ha ha ha--they'll take you away, man. You can't.

  • Today's comedian has a cross to bear that he built himself. A comedian of the older generation did an "act" and he told the audience, "This is my act." Today's comic is not doing an act. The audience assumes he's telling the truth. What is truth today may be a damn lie next week.

  • The reason I'm in this business, I assume all performers are--it's "Look at me, Ma!" It's acceptance, you know--"Look at me, Ma, look at me, Ma, look at me, Ma."

  • All my humor is based upon destruction and despair.