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Heller, Joseph

  • He was a self-made man who owed his lack of success to nobody.

  • He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt.

  • He knew everything about literature except how to enjoy it.

  • Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.

  • How did I get here? Somebody pushed me. Somebody must have set me off in this direction and clusters of other hands must have touched themselves to the controls at various times, for I would not have picked this way for the world.

  • I think that maybe in every company today there is always at least one person who is going crazy slowly.

  • Frankly, I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry.

  • Peace on earth would mean the end of civilization as we know it.

  • Success and failure are both difficult to endure. Along with success come drugs, divorce, fornication, bullying, travel, medication, depression, neurosis and suicide. With failure comes failure.